Family Pressure

So last night I joined my parents for a typical mom, dad, and daughter dinner. I had made Stuffed Zucchini and they were smelling delicious! I always get at least 3 zucchinis and cut the whole zucchini in half to prep them. So I end up with 6 halves. I stuffed these babies full of rice, lean ground beef and some tomato sauce; they can be quite filling.

My mom served out the dinner and set the plates on the tables. What does my mom do? She serves everyone a whole zucchini, so two halves.
I finished one half and let it sit for a few minutes. I decided I was not full just yet. But after a few bites into the second half I was DONE!

My mom proceeds to ask me why I am not eating.

Me – “Because I am no longer hungry mom. I am full.”
Mom – “Why are you full? What have you been eating all day?”
Me – “I am just done. You always tell me that I have really packed on the pounds and gained a lot of weight. Now I am doing things to change that and here you are trying to make me finish dinner when I simply can not. I am trying to lose weight by eating less and moving more, yet you still pack my plate full of food and expect me to lick it clean.”

I am starting to wonder if part of my weight gain was because I was always told to clean my plate? I come from a big Italian family, and eating is what we do best. No meal is ever short of courses or calories. Part of what my brothers and I were always taught is to eat what is in front of you because if not you are insulting the cook some how. Or in my mom’s case we are wasting food and money. I don’t always know how to say NO.

I struggle with turning down the food just like I struggle resisting good food!

Last night I got treated like a child going to bed without dessert because I did not finish my dinner. I know there are many other factors to my weight gain than just the pressures from my family. But can this be a reason I have gained some of the weight that I have? Do all those years of being told to finish my plate still effect me now?

How many times have you heard similar things from your families?
How do you deal with the pressures?
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5 thoughts on “Family Pressure

  1. Shannon @ BetterNextTime

    There’s a book called “Fattitudes” by Jeffrey & Norean Wilbert – it helped me figure out some of the reasons from my past that still effect the way I eat today. I had no idea how much some stuff from childhood was still in my head today.

    I don’t hear these kind of comments, though – it’s possible I bit my parents’ heads off one too many times during my sketchy teenage years for them to attempt any comments. 🙂

  2. Jessica

    I think your home environment can definitely cause weight gain. When I moved out of my parent’s house I easily lost 20lbs because the amount of food a served myself was vastly different to the servings I recieved at home.

  3. Deb

    You have a lot of really good insight into yourself. She is probably repeating patterns that she heard as a daughter. Also, is there a possibility that she feel threatened because you ate less than she did? Maybe she thinks you think she eats too much?

  4. Katie

    Playing devil’s advocate here: I think it was just a mom’s concern for her daughter’s wellbeing. I think she ultimately means well but doesn’t necessarily know how to show support in your journey. Cut her some slack…Just because she made you feel slightly uncomfortable, you did the right thing by not finishing and stopping when you were full. Moms will be moms!


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